Healing is seeing what was unseen. Healing feeling what was too much. Healing is connecting with what was disconnected from. Healing is understanding what didn't make any sense.
This is why "healing" relationships are "safe" relationships.
Healing relational trauma happens when you see what was unseen, or feel what was too much in the presence of another.
Since the very nature of shame is judgment that makes us feel unworthy of love and belonging, we experience liberation when something we thought was not okay becomes okay in the presence of another.
This is also why being present instead of fixing is so powerful.
The simplicity of nonjudgmental presence and attentiveness without the need to "do" anything is fertile ground for unravelling and completing the trauma of our past.